December 3, 2009

The newspaper, or any news media for that matter, has never really been known for oozing positive stories – quite the opposite, in fact. There are the occasional lighthearted stories, but they are either posted somewhere in the back of the paper or in the last half hour of the show when everyone has gone to work. My husband has always liked the sports page of the paper, mostly because he’s an athlete and sports fan, but also because “it’s the one place where the images are usually more positive.” It seems, however, that negativity is creeping into these pages as well. With the recent confessions of Tiger Woods and his “transgressions” in his marriage, to the countless baseball players using steroids, it’s all a bit too depressing for me.


I guess I was really struck this week by the events that happened with Tiger Woods. Not so much because of him in particular, but just because these types of occurrences seem to be happening on a more regular basis. You see a sports figure, or any other celebrity for that matter, and it seems like they have everything. But do they really? From the outside, Tiger Woods appears to have it all – he is a multi-millionaire, gets to play golf for a living, is married to a Swedish model, and has two beautiful children. What’s not to envy? And yet, somehow, that’s not enough for him. And it’s funny because the public is so surprised that such a quiet force in golf has made such a loud blunder.

Why are we so surprised though? Well, for one, we think he has it all and can’t imagine how he could possibly be unhappy with his life. Why does a man need to cheat on his gorgeous model wife? I think this story clearly illustrates that money doesn’t make you happy. Money is of course necessary, can give you a great deal of freedom and can significantly reduce stress in life. But, just money itself does not make one happy. It does not provide for a happy marriage or make you a good parent. Many people believe that buying their children another X-box game or showering them with gifts is what they want. Of course they would like those things, but kids are really searching for your love and time and would never want material items over your attention. My kids love their toys but if I say, “Let’s read some books,” they are rushing over to spend time with me. My point being – I don’t need money to have a good relationship with my children or my husband. Nobody needs money for these things, so we shouldn’t believe that just because people we see in the media that “have it all” really do. They may have money or fame but that is no guarantee of a happy home.

The second reason we are so surprised is because we elevate people to unnatural levels of fame. We are amazed with Tiger Woods because we can’t believe what amazing hand eye coordination he possesses. We go crazy over music legends and sports figures because they have talents that entertain us. What is unfortunate to me in this world is how we judge a person solely on their talents and abilities, and not on their character. Perhaps that is because people with true character are not usually looking for fame or the limelight. They quietly go through their days being the good people they are and the media does not take notice of that because it’s boring. I guess my entire point here is that while we can still admire and enjoy the entertainment factor celebrities bring to us, we need to stop being so surprised by their transgressions (nor should we excuse them). Instead, we need to simply admire them for their talent, remember they are a form of entertainment, and start opening up our eyes to those quiet everyday heroes that are present in our lives on a daily basis. Positive images and people need not come from the media (although they occasionally do). Instead we should be looking at the people around us – the couple who has been married for 25 years and is happy and loyal – the teacher who gives countless hours to kids because he knows they need it – the women’s shelter volunteer who helps a woman and her child break a cycle. Whose character do you admire?  What positive effect can they have on your life?