Affirmation: I trust myself
Hello everyone! I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving holiday. I was blessed to spend time with my family and also to celebrate my daughter’s second birthday. My husband was off for most of the week and we got to spend a lot of time together. It’s been such a relaxing few days and I am grateful.
Now it’s back to work for me. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about my future the last few days. I tend to reflect when I have some down time. I noticed when I was doing this my insecurities and fears about the future would creep in a little too often. It’s always the…What if this doesn’t happen? Or…What if I can’t do that? Or…What if something becomes out of my control? I’ve always been a bit of a worry wart. I think I inherited it…my mom is a worrier, her dad was a worrier. So, I can’t really help the genetic ability to worry like nobody’s business. If you ever need someone to worry for you, just give me a call! In all seriousness, the worrying is not good for me. Once you start down that path your mind can take you to deep, dark places. For example, my husband and I have been together for 15 years (married for 12), but when we first started dating I was so in love with him that I was worried that he would leave me, or find someone better, or things wouldn’t work out. I was very young at the time, but my worries would sometimes keep me up at night. At that time I didn’t trust our love or the process of building our lives together. I was insecure. Now, 15 years later, and two beautiful children, I am still just as much in love with him, if not more, but I never worry that things won’t work out. They already have! Every day I get to spend with him and we get to raise our children together is a bonus. Yes, I hope to grow old together, but I don’t worry that it won’t happen. I just know it will. I trust him, I trust myself, and I trust what we have built together.
I would love to have this same confidence in other areas of my life. But I often find myself not trusting. Louise L. Hay often says that we must “trust the process of life.” What does she mean exactly? Well, I think she means we must understand that the ups and downs and highs and lows are all essential to building our lives. We can’t just sail through the good and never experience the bad. The bad often teaches us more than the good anyway, and often times guides us in amazing directions we never would have otherwise thought of. When I quit my job over four years ago to be a stay home mom I was thrilled at first. Then I started doubting my decision. Did I make a good career move? Can I really handle the hard work of a stay home mom? To be honest, I struggled with this decision for quite some time. I never regretted the moments with my child, but I wondered if I was doing the right thing. I did not trust my new path. I would say in the last year I have made peace with my decision. I have fully adapted to my new life and am embarking on new and exciting adventures. Things I could never have done if I had stayed working. Plus, and most importantly, I have had the privilege of watching my children grow and learn. I am incredibly grateful for the path I am on.
As you can see from my examples, it is not always easy to trust our lives and where we are headed. Insecurities and worries invade our heads from time to time (or more often for worry warts). Hay reminds us, “We trust that our next breath is there. Let’s begin to trust that other things will be there for us, also.” Ask yourself today – What can I have a little more faith in? Take some time to trust the process of life!
Monday, November 30, 2009
Monday, November 23, 2009
November 23, 2009
Two Month Update
It’s hard to believe that it’s already been two months since I began this project. I am still looking forward to writing as many mornings as I can steal away, and I am constantly inspired. Thanks to all my friends and followers! In my very first post I mentioned one of my goals was to wake up and be excited about the day ahead. I had felt that I was dragging through my days. While there are still days where I am dragging, I am finding myself a little bit more excited and alive. I am certainly enjoying my time with my children more. One thing I have found that is extremely helpful in being positive is walking and eating healthy. It’s hard to be positive when you are tired and out of sorts, so I have learned the importance of daily exercise and balanced meals. It’s amazing how much those two things affect your mood. I think that writing on a regular basis has also been good for my soul. I can let out my feelings and thoughts in a constructive manner, and in doing so, I think I have already significantly elevated my happiness level.
While I have been writing, reading books and trying to come up ideas to push my writing career to the next level (one that I actually get paid to do); I have yet to accomplish anything significant. I still don’t think I have given 100% in this area. I tell myself that I have small children and it’s hard to find the time, which is partly true, but I also know this is a convenient excuse. For some reason I am still hesitating. I think it’s partly because I have never been really good at giving myself deadlines. I do really well when other people give me deadlines, but when I am left to my own devices I tend to procrastinate. While it certainly is harder to have a writing career with small children, it is not impossible. J.K. Rowling wrote Harry Potter in a coffee shop with her baby in tow. She wanted it – she made it happen. I have to want it enough. Dreams are easy – making them come true is hard!
I also have to get organized. In fact, that’s my biggest goal for the next month. I have always been pretty laid back and just go with the flow but I think that’s actually detrimental to me now, especially with small children. I need to get organized, get on a better schedule and make my life flow. I think that in doing so I will be able to schedule time for me to work and follow my dreams. I tend to think of the million other things I have to do when I’m writing and get easily distracted. If I am organized and have a time and a place for everything I think it will be much easier for me to sit down and work on my writing without distractions. (At least I hope this will be the case.) I went out and bought a day organizer and am setting a daily schedule for myself.
I am determined to continue to work on my weaknesses, pull from my strengths and make my dreams come true. I will not give up! Being positive and changing my thought patterns has been more difficult than I ever imagined it would be. But I can already see some amazing changes and it is well worth the ride!
It’s hard to believe that it’s already been two months since I began this project. I am still looking forward to writing as many mornings as I can steal away, and I am constantly inspired. Thanks to all my friends and followers! In my very first post I mentioned one of my goals was to wake up and be excited about the day ahead. I had felt that I was dragging through my days. While there are still days where I am dragging, I am finding myself a little bit more excited and alive. I am certainly enjoying my time with my children more. One thing I have found that is extremely helpful in being positive is walking and eating healthy. It’s hard to be positive when you are tired and out of sorts, so I have learned the importance of daily exercise and balanced meals. It’s amazing how much those two things affect your mood. I think that writing on a regular basis has also been good for my soul. I can let out my feelings and thoughts in a constructive manner, and in doing so, I think I have already significantly elevated my happiness level.
While I have been writing, reading books and trying to come up ideas to push my writing career to the next level (one that I actually get paid to do); I have yet to accomplish anything significant. I still don’t think I have given 100% in this area. I tell myself that I have small children and it’s hard to find the time, which is partly true, but I also know this is a convenient excuse. For some reason I am still hesitating. I think it’s partly because I have never been really good at giving myself deadlines. I do really well when other people give me deadlines, but when I am left to my own devices I tend to procrastinate. While it certainly is harder to have a writing career with small children, it is not impossible. J.K. Rowling wrote Harry Potter in a coffee shop with her baby in tow. She wanted it – she made it happen. I have to want it enough. Dreams are easy – making them come true is hard!
I also have to get organized. In fact, that’s my biggest goal for the next month. I have always been pretty laid back and just go with the flow but I think that’s actually detrimental to me now, especially with small children. I need to get organized, get on a better schedule and make my life flow. I think that in doing so I will be able to schedule time for me to work and follow my dreams. I tend to think of the million other things I have to do when I’m writing and get easily distracted. If I am organized and have a time and a place for everything I think it will be much easier for me to sit down and work on my writing without distractions. (At least I hope this will be the case.) I went out and bought a day organizer and am setting a daily schedule for myself.
I am determined to continue to work on my weaknesses, pull from my strengths and make my dreams come true. I will not give up! Being positive and changing my thought patterns has been more difficult than I ever imagined it would be. But I can already see some amazing changes and it is well worth the ride!
Friday, November 20, 2009
November 20, 2009
I have been out of the loop this week because my oldest child has been sick. I’ve been dealing with doctors, fevers and sleepless nights. I wanted to check in and write something positive and inspiring, but I have to be honest – I am exhausted and the words are not flowing to me. I woke up early this morning to have a few moments to write this, thinking that my children would sleep, only to find little footsteps trailing just behind me. Needless to say I am not in the best place today. So, why am I still writing? Good question! Well, writing is cathartic for me. Just the act of writing makes me calm and puts me in a better place. And, I think it’s important to show, even though I am writing a blog about being positive, I sometimes have my off moments, or days or even weeks. This is a natural part of life. I could have not mentioned my mood or my bad week and just written something. But it would not have been from the heart.
I’ve been thinking this week that Thanksgiving is just around the corner, as well as my daughter’s second birthday. It’s a time of year that inspires people to take a look at everything they are grateful for. I love how Thanksgiving inspires people to count their blessings. It’s been hard to count anything this week, much less blessings, but I certainly do have a lot to be thankful for – beautiful children, remarkable husband, wonderful family, fantastic friends. We often lament on the things in our lives that haven’t gone well, so it’s nice to reflect on what is right in our lives. While being positive about our lives is important, and the point of this project, I think it’s also equally important to look back on those things in our lives that we saw as difficult and trying. Why? Because those things have made us who we are today. The hardest lessons are the ones that we learn the most from. So, in addition to taking a look at those things we are grateful for, let’s take a few moments to look at those things that have made us stronger.
For me, the past four and a half years have contained the most difficult, trying moments of my life. Four and a half years is the amount of time I have been a parent. This past week is not the first time I have been out of sorts, frustrated and generally exhausted. And it certainly won’t be the last. While my days have been filled with many amazing moments, I have also had long days of temper tantrums (theirs and mine), illness, whining and never-ending loads of laundry. Some days I am counting the hours until my children go to bed and I can hear myself think. Four years ago I became a stay home mom and raising my children has been my full time job. I would never trade this job for anything because I am so blessed to be able to raise and watch my children grow. But, it is also the most difficult job I have ever done. Partly because I think I have always had a bit of a lazy streak. I am a natural procrastinator and am pretty laid back about things. Children, however, do not allow you to procrastinate or be lazy. You have to be at the top of your game – if you want to do a good job, that is. There are times when I desperately wish I could go to work for the day. But, at the end of the day, or the end of the bad week, I know that I am a stronger person because of my work as a mom. I am grateful for the depth in character I have received over these past years raising children. I never would have been as resilient if it hadn’t been for my children. The lessons I have learned over the past four and a half years are priceless. Not always easy lessons, but ones that I would never change because they are making me a better person.
As I wrap up this post I am already feeling better. I have worked through my feelings, looked back on the hard times I have encountered, and my children have been content to watch a cartoon for a little while. What more could I ask for? I encourage you to take a few moments to look at those things that have made you a stronger person, and ask yourself why you are grateful for those lessons. It’s a wonderful time of year to give thanks for what we have and what we have learned.
I’ve been thinking this week that Thanksgiving is just around the corner, as well as my daughter’s second birthday. It’s a time of year that inspires people to take a look at everything they are grateful for. I love how Thanksgiving inspires people to count their blessings. It’s been hard to count anything this week, much less blessings, but I certainly do have a lot to be thankful for – beautiful children, remarkable husband, wonderful family, fantastic friends. We often lament on the things in our lives that haven’t gone well, so it’s nice to reflect on what is right in our lives. While being positive about our lives is important, and the point of this project, I think it’s also equally important to look back on those things in our lives that we saw as difficult and trying. Why? Because those things have made us who we are today. The hardest lessons are the ones that we learn the most from. So, in addition to taking a look at those things we are grateful for, let’s take a few moments to look at those things that have made us stronger.
For me, the past four and a half years have contained the most difficult, trying moments of my life. Four and a half years is the amount of time I have been a parent. This past week is not the first time I have been out of sorts, frustrated and generally exhausted. And it certainly won’t be the last. While my days have been filled with many amazing moments, I have also had long days of temper tantrums (theirs and mine), illness, whining and never-ending loads of laundry. Some days I am counting the hours until my children go to bed and I can hear myself think. Four years ago I became a stay home mom and raising my children has been my full time job. I would never trade this job for anything because I am so blessed to be able to raise and watch my children grow. But, it is also the most difficult job I have ever done. Partly because I think I have always had a bit of a lazy streak. I am a natural procrastinator and am pretty laid back about things. Children, however, do not allow you to procrastinate or be lazy. You have to be at the top of your game – if you want to do a good job, that is. There are times when I desperately wish I could go to work for the day. But, at the end of the day, or the end of the bad week, I know that I am a stronger person because of my work as a mom. I am grateful for the depth in character I have received over these past years raising children. I never would have been as resilient if it hadn’t been for my children. The lessons I have learned over the past four and a half years are priceless. Not always easy lessons, but ones that I would never change because they are making me a better person.
As I wrap up this post I am already feeling better. I have worked through my feelings, looked back on the hard times I have encountered, and my children have been content to watch a cartoon for a little while. What more could I ask for? I encourage you to take a few moments to look at those things that have made you a stronger person, and ask yourself why you are grateful for those lessons. It’s a wonderful time of year to give thanks for what we have and what we have learned.
Monday, November 16, 2009
November 16, 2009
The ability to stay in a relationship and/or marriage and remain happy is elusive to many people. Because of such a high divorce rate in our country, and the amount of people who remain in unhappy relationships, marriage is often thought of as an unsuccessful venture. Is it really fruitless or is there a key missing for some people? In the December issue of Oprah magazine there is an article entitled, “How to Make the Romance Last – The truth about what keeps marriages together.” Written by Helen Fisher, PhD, she examines the secrets held by those in happy marriages. I was intrigued by this article for several reasons, but primarily because I consider myself happily married, and have been so for the past 12 years.
The first point Fisher discusses is romantic love. When we first meet someone and fall for them we find ourselves head over heels, over the top “in love,” and feeling like the world is perfect. But how long does this last? Fisher says, “Psychologists maintain that the dizzying feeling of intense romantic love lasts only about 18 months to – at best – three years.” So, whether one is married or in a long-term relationship, eventually they will find the romantic love fizzling out. Hopefully it is replaced by a deeper more committed love. In a study of couples in their 50s married an average of 21 years, Fisher noted that “Among the older lovers, brain regions associated with anxiety were no longer active; instead, there was activity in the areas associated with calmness.” Essentially, intense romantic love is replaced by a deep peace and consistency in spending their lives with someone.
So, what is the secret to going from intense romantic love to a deeply committed, peaceful, happy love? Fisher says that psychologist Marcel Zenter, PhD, of the University of Geneva, found in a study of 470 couples on compatibility one factor linking them all – “the ability to sustain your ‘positive illusions.’” Fisher believes that men and women who continue to maintain that their partner is attractive, funny, kind, and ideal for them in just about every way remain content with each other. What exactly does this mean? I think I can give you an example. My husband carries a picture of me in his wallet – my high school graduation picture. Right out of high school is when we started dating (15 years ago). My husband still sees me looking the way I do in the picture, despite the passage of time, two children and the stresses that occur with life. While I am certainly not old, I do look quite a bit different now than in the picture – positive illusion. I am certain that he will still be carrying this picture when I am 80 years old. Again, positive illusion - although some may argue dementia at that point. The idea is that he still sees me as beautiful, but more importantly, the person he is meant to be with. And I see him the same way. We have grown up together, so to speak, but the things I saw in him 15 years ago are the same things I see in him now.
I think when marriages fail it is because we were never certain how much we knew the person from the very start. Or, because the things we saw in the person at the start are being overshadowed by things that can’t be looked past. We are told the key to a happy marriage is communication and work. While these items are important, I think the real secret is looking at your partner in a positive light. What have you always loved about them? What will you always love about them? If you are in a relationship where you can’t see the good on a regular basis, it will never endure. The person I married, the core of who he is, has never changed. I love that person! If the little stuff starts taking precedence, than the relationship is bound to spiral downward. I guess it’s all about finding the right person from the start. And once you do, take a snapshot and never forget that image!
The first point Fisher discusses is romantic love. When we first meet someone and fall for them we find ourselves head over heels, over the top “in love,” and feeling like the world is perfect. But how long does this last? Fisher says, “Psychologists maintain that the dizzying feeling of intense romantic love lasts only about 18 months to – at best – three years.” So, whether one is married or in a long-term relationship, eventually they will find the romantic love fizzling out. Hopefully it is replaced by a deeper more committed love. In a study of couples in their 50s married an average of 21 years, Fisher noted that “Among the older lovers, brain regions associated with anxiety were no longer active; instead, there was activity in the areas associated with calmness.” Essentially, intense romantic love is replaced by a deep peace and consistency in spending their lives with someone.
So, what is the secret to going from intense romantic love to a deeply committed, peaceful, happy love? Fisher says that psychologist Marcel Zenter, PhD, of the University of Geneva, found in a study of 470 couples on compatibility one factor linking them all – “the ability to sustain your ‘positive illusions.’” Fisher believes that men and women who continue to maintain that their partner is attractive, funny, kind, and ideal for them in just about every way remain content with each other. What exactly does this mean? I think I can give you an example. My husband carries a picture of me in his wallet – my high school graduation picture. Right out of high school is when we started dating (15 years ago). My husband still sees me looking the way I do in the picture, despite the passage of time, two children and the stresses that occur with life. While I am certainly not old, I do look quite a bit different now than in the picture – positive illusion. I am certain that he will still be carrying this picture when I am 80 years old. Again, positive illusion - although some may argue dementia at that point. The idea is that he still sees me as beautiful, but more importantly, the person he is meant to be with. And I see him the same way. We have grown up together, so to speak, but the things I saw in him 15 years ago are the same things I see in him now.
I think when marriages fail it is because we were never certain how much we knew the person from the very start. Or, because the things we saw in the person at the start are being overshadowed by things that can’t be looked past. We are told the key to a happy marriage is communication and work. While these items are important, I think the real secret is looking at your partner in a positive light. What have you always loved about them? What will you always love about them? If you are in a relationship where you can’t see the good on a regular basis, it will never endure. The person I married, the core of who he is, has never changed. I love that person! If the little stuff starts taking precedence, than the relationship is bound to spiral downward. I guess it’s all about finding the right person from the start. And once you do, take a snapshot and never forget that image!
Thursday, November 12, 2009
November 12, 2009
Affirmation: My thoughts support and strengthen my immune system
(Affirmation from "Meditations to Heal Your Life" by Louise L. Hay)
One of the issues of the current day that we are all discussing and/or worrying about is H1N1 (aka Swine Flu). A vaccine has been made but is debatable at this point and not everyone is eligible for it. We can take precautionary measures by diligently washing our hands, getting plenty of rest and eating healthy. But I want to talk about using our thoughts as another method of strengthening and supporting our immune system.
Carol Ryff, a psychology professor at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, says that there is a link between what’s going on in the brain and the body. She says that “positive people have stronger, more robust, immune systems, which means they can fight off colds, flus, infections and more.” The Mayo Clinic notes that while it is hard to measure happiness, there are several studies that link positive thinking with reduced illness and disease. In an article from the Mayo Clinic staff entitled, “Stress relief from laughter? Yes, no joke,” they affirm that “negative thoughts manifest into chemical reactions that can impact your body by bringing more stress into your system and decreasing your immunity. In contrast, positive thoughts actually release neuropeptides that help fight stress and potentially more-serious illnesses.”
Have you ever gone through a stressful period of time and then when it was over you got sick? You look forward to some vacation time or a few days off at home and you end up with a cold? Perhaps that’s because stress has weakened our immune system. While it is not entirely possible to avoid all stress, it is possible to change our thoughts on the situation at hand. It is also equally important to make sure that we are eating healthy and getting plenty of rest. It is very difficult to work on our thought patterns or think positively when we are exhausted and undernourished.
We read and hear so much in the news, usually about the deaths or bad reactions to the vaccine, so it’s hard to remain positive about the flu virus. Louise L. Hay reminds us that “the media wants to sell their products, and they dig up the worst scenarios to catch our attention.” I’m not saying that there haven’t been some horrible cases or that we can’t take preventative measures. What I am saying is that reducing our stress and keeping our negative thoughts in check is just as powerful a precautionary measure as any other. Reducing stress and anxiety in our homes and bringing in more laughter and encouragement will also help our children to fight off illness. Our mental health is important to maintain during this flu and cold season. It could be the best defense we have!
(Affirmation from "Meditations to Heal Your Life" by Louise L. Hay)
One of the issues of the current day that we are all discussing and/or worrying about is H1N1 (aka Swine Flu). A vaccine has been made but is debatable at this point and not everyone is eligible for it. We can take precautionary measures by diligently washing our hands, getting plenty of rest and eating healthy. But I want to talk about using our thoughts as another method of strengthening and supporting our immune system.
Carol Ryff, a psychology professor at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, says that there is a link between what’s going on in the brain and the body. She says that “positive people have stronger, more robust, immune systems, which means they can fight off colds, flus, infections and more.” The Mayo Clinic notes that while it is hard to measure happiness, there are several studies that link positive thinking with reduced illness and disease. In an article from the Mayo Clinic staff entitled, “Stress relief from laughter? Yes, no joke,” they affirm that “negative thoughts manifest into chemical reactions that can impact your body by bringing more stress into your system and decreasing your immunity. In contrast, positive thoughts actually release neuropeptides that help fight stress and potentially more-serious illnesses.”
Have you ever gone through a stressful period of time and then when it was over you got sick? You look forward to some vacation time or a few days off at home and you end up with a cold? Perhaps that’s because stress has weakened our immune system. While it is not entirely possible to avoid all stress, it is possible to change our thoughts on the situation at hand. It is also equally important to make sure that we are eating healthy and getting plenty of rest. It is very difficult to work on our thought patterns or think positively when we are exhausted and undernourished.
We read and hear so much in the news, usually about the deaths or bad reactions to the vaccine, so it’s hard to remain positive about the flu virus. Louise L. Hay reminds us that “the media wants to sell their products, and they dig up the worst scenarios to catch our attention.” I’m not saying that there haven’t been some horrible cases or that we can’t take preventative measures. What I am saying is that reducing our stress and keeping our negative thoughts in check is just as powerful a precautionary measure as any other. Reducing stress and anxiety in our homes and bringing in more laughter and encouragement will also help our children to fight off illness. Our mental health is important to maintain during this flu and cold season. It could be the best defense we have!
Monday, November 9, 2009
November 9, 2009
Yesterday I had a few hours to myself thanks to my mom and sister. I went to the downtown area where my mom lives and walked into a beautiful bakery. Everything on the shelves looked fantastic and the aromas were intoxicating. There was an older lady, beautifully dressed, eyeing several things and clearly having a hard time making a decision. Her husband was waiting for her and she just couldn’t decide what to pick. She finally decided on a peanut butter cookie. Before she could pay the cashier I handed over the two dollars and said “Have a great day!” I was partaking in the 29 day challenge to give to others. I saw her run to her husband with a big grin on her face – she could hardly believe that I had paid for her cookie.
I wanted to share this story today because I think there is one thing we should all remember about giving to others. This lady clearly had a lot of money. Both she and her husband were dressed very well; she had beautiful shoes and a gorgeous purse. She did not need me to buy her a two dollar cookie. In fact, I guarantee that this woman has a great deal more in her bank account than is floating in mine. It’s not about the money though. It’s about the gesture. I think it’s easy for people to give to those that are less fortunate than we are, and that’s important to do. However, I think it’s also important to do kind things for those that have money simply because it’s kind. I put such a smile on her face and she was incredibly surprised. Again, it was not about the two dollars. Rich people need kind gestures just the same as all the rest of us.
The reason I decided to buy a cookie for this woman had nothing to do with her appearance or ability to pay. I did it because I loved the way she was eyeing the choices like a kid in a toy store. It was such a pleasure to watch her and it was even more of pleasure to see her eyes light up after my kind gesture. I love the idea of giving to others in small ways. I remember how good I felt when someone bought me breakfast and then bought me coffee. But the feeling is even better when you are giving to someone else. I encourage everyone to partake in the giving challenge and to remember that every person can use a lift now and then.
Writing Update
I received a great contact from a friend who has a friend who works for a travel magazine. I sent her an email with some writing samples and a proposal for doing pieces for her. Will keep you posted!
I wanted to share this story today because I think there is one thing we should all remember about giving to others. This lady clearly had a lot of money. Both she and her husband were dressed very well; she had beautiful shoes and a gorgeous purse. She did not need me to buy her a two dollar cookie. In fact, I guarantee that this woman has a great deal more in her bank account than is floating in mine. It’s not about the money though. It’s about the gesture. I think it’s easy for people to give to those that are less fortunate than we are, and that’s important to do. However, I think it’s also important to do kind things for those that have money simply because it’s kind. I put such a smile on her face and she was incredibly surprised. Again, it was not about the two dollars. Rich people need kind gestures just the same as all the rest of us.
The reason I decided to buy a cookie for this woman had nothing to do with her appearance or ability to pay. I did it because I loved the way she was eyeing the choices like a kid in a toy store. It was such a pleasure to watch her and it was even more of pleasure to see her eyes light up after my kind gesture. I love the idea of giving to others in small ways. I remember how good I felt when someone bought me breakfast and then bought me coffee. But the feeling is even better when you are giving to someone else. I encourage everyone to partake in the giving challenge and to remember that every person can use a lift now and then.
Writing Update
I received a great contact from a friend who has a friend who works for a travel magazine. I sent her an email with some writing samples and a proposal for doing pieces for her. Will keep you posted!
Friday, November 6, 2009
November 6, 2009
Affirmation: I am a peaceful traveler.
(Affirmation from "Meditations to Heal Your Life" by Louise L. Hay)
I am thrilled because today I get to fly to Northern California to visit my mom and sister. I always love seeing them and it’s been awhile so I’ve been looking forward to this trip for quite some time. I am however a bit apprehensive because I am flying alone with my 4 year old and 2 year old. Luckily the flight is just over an hour, but it is still a journey with young children. I have packed snacks, toys and new coloring books. But what can I pack to keep my sanity in check?
Louise L. Hay says that throughout the day you should “check on [your] body’s tension level. No matter where [you are] take a moment to sit quietly, breathe deeply, and release any tension.” I tend to be a people pleaser, so my biggest tension when traveling (besides the fear of losing my children in the crowds) is annoying other people. Children tend to be naturally loud and rambunctious when confined with adults in a small space. Today I am going to try something different – I am going to focus on the needs of my children and not worry about those surrounding me. It is not my responsibility to make their trip pleasant. I just need to get my children safely and happily from one destination to another. I will not of course allow them to be rude or scream, etc. I will, however, allow them to be kids, and I think that if I spend my time focusing on them that they will respond well to that. Instead of just trying to “get through” the situation, I want to try to make our time traveling fun. I’m going to enjoy coloring with them and singing songs and reading books. When else can I sit with my children and just play – not having to worry about cleaning the house or answering the phone or paying the bills. It’s actually a gift to get to spend quality one on one time – no interruptions!
The most important thing I can pack today is a positive attitude, a bit of patience and a side of humility. I will take Hay’s advice to “put love into my trip,” and I know that all will be well. Here’s to happy traveling!
(Affirmation from "Meditations to Heal Your Life" by Louise L. Hay)
I am thrilled because today I get to fly to Northern California to visit my mom and sister. I always love seeing them and it’s been awhile so I’ve been looking forward to this trip for quite some time. I am however a bit apprehensive because I am flying alone with my 4 year old and 2 year old. Luckily the flight is just over an hour, but it is still a journey with young children. I have packed snacks, toys and new coloring books. But what can I pack to keep my sanity in check?
Louise L. Hay says that throughout the day you should “check on [your] body’s tension level. No matter where [you are] take a moment to sit quietly, breathe deeply, and release any tension.” I tend to be a people pleaser, so my biggest tension when traveling (besides the fear of losing my children in the crowds) is annoying other people. Children tend to be naturally loud and rambunctious when confined with adults in a small space. Today I am going to try something different – I am going to focus on the needs of my children and not worry about those surrounding me. It is not my responsibility to make their trip pleasant. I just need to get my children safely and happily from one destination to another. I will not of course allow them to be rude or scream, etc. I will, however, allow them to be kids, and I think that if I spend my time focusing on them that they will respond well to that. Instead of just trying to “get through” the situation, I want to try to make our time traveling fun. I’m going to enjoy coloring with them and singing songs and reading books. When else can I sit with my children and just play – not having to worry about cleaning the house or answering the phone or paying the bills. It’s actually a gift to get to spend quality one on one time – no interruptions!
The most important thing I can pack today is a positive attitude, a bit of patience and a side of humility. I will take Hay’s advice to “put love into my trip,” and I know that all will be well. Here’s to happy traveling!
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
November 4, 2009
Last week I gave myself one week to form a first draft of my short romance story for Woman’s World magazine, and I promised that I would update my status. I read through several back issues to get a good grasp on how the story should go, and then…nothing happened. I did not write what I said I would write. I can’t believe I just wrote that statement. But, I want to be honest. So, why did I not complete this task? I actually stayed up late wondering that. I did sit down several times and write notes about how the story should go but nothing ever seemed to pan out for me. I let the thoughts run through my mind as I was washing dishes or folding laundry, and still nothing. I do tend to be a procrastinator, but since I had set this deadline for myself I was really working towards accomplishing this goal.
The day before yesterday one of my friends was asking me about my story progress and what exactly this romance story was. I reminded her that it was just a “cheesy romance story.” Note my choice of the word “cheesy.” I in no way want to disparage anyone who has written one of these stories, I actually have the utmost respect for anyone who writes something and is published, but every time I read one of these I think “this is simple, I can do this.” So, I set out to do it. The problem is that my heart is not in it. Writing a romance is not something I really aspire to do. I’m sure at some point I could do it, but even then it probably wouldn’t be that good because it’s not my passion. I am not passionate about writing a romance story. I am passionate about writing this blog and nonfiction articles and I think that shows in my writing. So, I think I set the wrong goal for myself a week ago. I set out to do something for the wrong reasons. My goals need to be more in tune with my passion in the world of writing instead of things I think I can do or will make me money.
While I am embarrassed to admit that I didn’t accomplish a goal I set for myself, I think it’s more important to be honest, understand why I didn’t, and let go of the guilt. Today my goal is to write down a list of goals that are more in tune with what I want to accomplish. One goal that I have already set for myself is by the end of the month to establish a positive thinking newsletter that I can email to anyone who is interested. I will keep you up to date on my progress with that and when it will be available.
This past week I have learned that I can’t just scratch the surface of my goals. I must dig deeper and discover what I am really about and what I want to contribute to the world. I must be honest with myself in order to get to where I want to be. So, instead of simply saying I want to be a writer I need to say: “I am a nonfiction writer.” Non-fiction is my passion. I want to write about travel, parenting, and positive thinking. While I wish that I could have said “I accomplished my goal,” I think I have learned an even more valuable lesson in discovering my true desires and which path I should take. Now, instead of a deadline looming over my head, I am inspired to write as much as possible on the above mentioned topics and see where that takes me. Now that I have figured out what I really want, the road is bound to be less bumpy.
The day before yesterday one of my friends was asking me about my story progress and what exactly this romance story was. I reminded her that it was just a “cheesy romance story.” Note my choice of the word “cheesy.” I in no way want to disparage anyone who has written one of these stories, I actually have the utmost respect for anyone who writes something and is published, but every time I read one of these I think “this is simple, I can do this.” So, I set out to do it. The problem is that my heart is not in it. Writing a romance is not something I really aspire to do. I’m sure at some point I could do it, but even then it probably wouldn’t be that good because it’s not my passion. I am not passionate about writing a romance story. I am passionate about writing this blog and nonfiction articles and I think that shows in my writing. So, I think I set the wrong goal for myself a week ago. I set out to do something for the wrong reasons. My goals need to be more in tune with my passion in the world of writing instead of things I think I can do or will make me money.
While I am embarrassed to admit that I didn’t accomplish a goal I set for myself, I think it’s more important to be honest, understand why I didn’t, and let go of the guilt. Today my goal is to write down a list of goals that are more in tune with what I want to accomplish. One goal that I have already set for myself is by the end of the month to establish a positive thinking newsletter that I can email to anyone who is interested. I will keep you up to date on my progress with that and when it will be available.
This past week I have learned that I can’t just scratch the surface of my goals. I must dig deeper and discover what I am really about and what I want to contribute to the world. I must be honest with myself in order to get to where I want to be. So, instead of simply saying I want to be a writer I need to say: “I am a nonfiction writer.” Non-fiction is my passion. I want to write about travel, parenting, and positive thinking. While I wish that I could have said “I accomplished my goal,” I think I have learned an even more valuable lesson in discovering my true desires and which path I should take. Now, instead of a deadline looming over my head, I am inspired to write as much as possible on the above mentioned topics and see where that takes me. Now that I have figured out what I really want, the road is bound to be less bumpy.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
November 1, 2009
Affirmation: I am relaxed and open to the world around me
Yesterday was Halloween and I had the most fabulous time. I have always loved the holiday but it is particularly special when you have small children. My 4 year old son is a pro at trick-or-treating, but my 23 month old daughter was new to the experience. Needless to say, after someone put candy in her bucket for the first time she was a pro. She expertly went to each location, thrilled to have candy repeatedly being dropped in her bucket. It’s kind of funny because you normally tell your children not to approach strangers and certainly not to take candy from them. Unless of course it is Halloween and they are dressed like a witch or a goblin. Then it’s ok.
As I watched my children tonight I realized how innocent they are. They are in awe of the world and open to new experiences. They are yet to be jaded. A certain amount of caution in the world is of course necessary as we grow older. We must learn to be wary of certain people and situations. However, I think many adults go too far and build large fences around themselves in order not to get hurt. And all of us have moments where we are just a bit too uptight. For instance, my daughter wore a beautiful costume last night – a St. Bernard with beautiful tan and white fur. As we were walking to our car to go trick-or-treating I told her, “Don’t get dirty before we go!” I wanted her to stay clean and look adorable. But being dirty is part of the fun, and isn’t a dog usually dirty anyway? My vision of what she should look like was quelling her fun and in this instance it wasn’t worth it. Her feet ended up dirty but her face was shining brightly. Did I really think she wouldn’t look adorable with a little dirt?
Whether we have a large fence around us or just a small one, we should take some time to look over the fence and make sure we are not missing out on something fabulous. Fences keep us safe but they also keep us locked in. There are times when we need to venture out of our comfort zones and go with the flow. We need to not worry about the dirt, or the spilled milk or the extra pieces of candy our children sneak from their Halloween buckets. Life is all about balance. We must keep some things in order and let some things go. I am learning that life is a beautiful experience, even if it is a little messy sometimes. The mess is part of the beauty. What can you let go of today?
Writing Update:
I received a couple of the books from the library that I was waiting for. One is about writing query letters to editors and the other is about writing and publishing creative nonfiction. I am still waiting for the Writer’s Market, which lists all the various publishers and editors. While I wait for that book I am diving into the other books so that I have a good grasp of what I need to do to get ahead.
Yesterday was Halloween and I had the most fabulous time. I have always loved the holiday but it is particularly special when you have small children. My 4 year old son is a pro at trick-or-treating, but my 23 month old daughter was new to the experience. Needless to say, after someone put candy in her bucket for the first time she was a pro. She expertly went to each location, thrilled to have candy repeatedly being dropped in her bucket. It’s kind of funny because you normally tell your children not to approach strangers and certainly not to take candy from them. Unless of course it is Halloween and they are dressed like a witch or a goblin. Then it’s ok.
As I watched my children tonight I realized how innocent they are. They are in awe of the world and open to new experiences. They are yet to be jaded. A certain amount of caution in the world is of course necessary as we grow older. We must learn to be wary of certain people and situations. However, I think many adults go too far and build large fences around themselves in order not to get hurt. And all of us have moments where we are just a bit too uptight. For instance, my daughter wore a beautiful costume last night – a St. Bernard with beautiful tan and white fur. As we were walking to our car to go trick-or-treating I told her, “Don’t get dirty before we go!” I wanted her to stay clean and look adorable. But being dirty is part of the fun, and isn’t a dog usually dirty anyway? My vision of what she should look like was quelling her fun and in this instance it wasn’t worth it. Her feet ended up dirty but her face was shining brightly. Did I really think she wouldn’t look adorable with a little dirt?
Whether we have a large fence around us or just a small one, we should take some time to look over the fence and make sure we are not missing out on something fabulous. Fences keep us safe but they also keep us locked in. There are times when we need to venture out of our comfort zones and go with the flow. We need to not worry about the dirt, or the spilled milk or the extra pieces of candy our children sneak from their Halloween buckets. Life is all about balance. We must keep some things in order and let some things go. I am learning that life is a beautiful experience, even if it is a little messy sometimes. The mess is part of the beauty. What can you let go of today?
Writing Update:
I received a couple of the books from the library that I was waiting for. One is about writing query letters to editors and the other is about writing and publishing creative nonfiction. I am still waiting for the Writer’s Market, which lists all the various publishers and editors. While I wait for that book I am diving into the other books so that I have a good grasp of what I need to do to get ahead.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)