October 25, 2009

Affirmation: Today, I drop my list of expectations!
(Affirmation from "Meditations to Heal Your Life" by Louise L. Hay)

Today my husband and I are taking our kids to the pumpkin patch. It is one of my very favorite activities to do in the fall. I love getting candy apples, picking out pumpkins, and watching the kids’ eyes light up with excitement. The pumpkin patch that we go to also has a petting zoo and it’s fantastic to watch the children pet the animals and get a little scared when they nibble at their hands for food. Needless to say, I am really looking forward to the day. My expectations are high.

The problem with high expectations is that the fall back to reality is pretty steep. You expect to be at the top of the mountain and instead you are at the bottom, or somewhere in between, and your view is much different than anticipated. My kids are at an age where temper tantrums, sibling rivalry and general disobedience can creep up at any moment and ruin even the best of days. Just the other night, for my husband’s birthday, I spent a great deal of the evening dealing with my son’s behavior because he was overexcited about the birthday celebration. The ironic part is that he was looking forward to the birthday dinner all day long, and when it actually arrived he was too worked up to enjoy it, and I was frustrated that his behavior was taking center stage.

Today I am hoping that my kids will behave, enjoy picking out pumpkins (agreeing on exactly the ones they want), and we will have a beautiful day together as a family. Is this possible? Sure! Is it likely? No. That doesn’t mean it can’t be a wonderful day though. Louise L. Hay points out that “unconditional love is really just love with no expectations.” Essentially it means that I must drop my list of expectations, go with the flow today, and enjoy the beautiful little moments that punctuate the day. In view of that, if my daughter drops her candy apple in the dirt, or my son gets bitten by a goat, I am going to remember that it is all part of the experience and it does not mean that the day is ruined. I will instead focus on the smiles my kids will inevitably have on their faces at some point during the day. My pictures will be priceless, even if one of the kids has tears rolling down their face or the other one refuses to smile. I will capture the moment, and whether the view is spectacular or cloudy, I am still pretty damn lucky to get to spend the day making memories with my kids!